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- - So I "raced" a retard....... (https://mitsubishiforum.com/forum/street-strip-18/so-i-%22raced%22-retard-17464/)

So I "raced" a retard.......

Here's the story, for all your entertainment:

I was at work a couple days ago, doing some training with a few other guys on car audio components, and one of the guys i work with starts going on about his car, about what sort of head unit he has in it, what subs, etc. Anyway, my friend Trey asks him the classic question "is it fast," and of course the guys says it is. Turns out the guy has a late model Pontiac Grand Am with the 2.4L and some frikin 20" chrome rims. Trey, who owns an '04 Sunfire w/ the 2.2 ECOTEC, 5spd and a K&N drop in offers to race him. Of course, this guy thinks that because he's got 2/10ths of a liter more than him that he'll smoke him. Well, to add insult to injury (since Trey is going to dust him because lighter car + manual tranny + good driver beats heavy car + auto + fat, retarted driver in this case), I offered to line up with them as well. He asked me what I had, I told him a Mitsubishi Mirage, he laughed and left it at that. Well we all line up on a wide street after work, about 10pm and get ready to go, and I don't make much of a scene (Trey knows that my car is faster and handles better, so he knows the outcome already), and just wait for a quiet moment after retard is done revving the crap out of his Grand Am. It gets quiet as the chick who's waving the start walks out, and I just let the engine loose, reving it up to about 4500 and letting the BOV go for a second and getting back on it.........oh wow, I thought this kid seriously took a crap in his pants when he saw the Rage cross the finish line about 10 car lengths in front of his. It can't really be construed as a "race," cuz there really wasn't any competition from him, but it made my night and I thought I'd share.