im reinventing numerous ways to try and vent and ease my mind but i cant.... grandmas in a hospital bed at the moment... cancer... and im not feeling at all that good.... sometimes whatever you may do, doesnt seem to be enough right?

 

I'm not an expert at making replies to these kind of subjects so keep that in mind but...

I know it's hard to come to grips with the thought of losing a relative, let alone grandparent. I lost 3 by the time I was 7 and never got to know my one grandfather (my dad's dad) who died while we were in the process of moving down here to Texas when I was only 4 months old. My 2 grandmothers who have passed away it was difficult for me, but as I look back I found that being able to recount the happy times I had spent visiting them really got me through. My grandpa is in his mid 80's now and though he is in great health I know that he won't be around forever and it kills me to think that I haven't gone up to visit him for 2 years now. I do know one thing and that is I do not want to visit him while he is in the hospital nearing his death. I don't want to have to see him in that type of condition and have that be the last time I saw him. I'd much rather be able to think that the last time I had seen him was while we were sitting outside on his front porch having a lemonade eating cherries and him recounting the days when he was a kid and would visit the town he now calls home, as a child.

As rough and insensitive as I may sound in telling you this, it seems like you going to visit her is only making it worse for you. Cancer is a fierce competitor, and though many have survived, older people the odds aren't always in their favor. You have done enough and she knows that what happens from here on is only told with time. Rather than being angry that you can't do more for her, sit back and think about the times as a kid spent visiting her and the like. Life is rough, and consider this one of the bumps in your travel.

I'm hoping for the best of you two.

 

thnk you much for your reply... but i disagree although it might be hard for me... hopefully ill be making it easier for her... i dont care at this point about me... i just want her to be comfy at least mentally... thnx again... and i calmed down... last night i was furious

 

im sorry to hear it man, but imsorta going through the same thing right now myself,but alot worse...

my moms had to have emergency surgery (ovaioncancer),the docs got 95% of thecancer and left 5%... my moms doesnt have insurance or medicare, so its been 4 months and my mom hasntrecieved her chemo due to the fact of having no money..weve tried to apply for medicare and all but they keep denying her, we cant get any help from anyone,so im going to try and do a benifit for her and see how much money we can raise but im sure its going to be short of the 100,000 plus that it cost...and ever since the surgery her back has been hurting very badly and all they do for her is give her pain killers which doing hardly anything for her..

we went to the ER a couple of weeks ago due to the back pain, but without money they couldnt do much but they did do a cat scan and it showed that the cancer had started to spread...i dont know what to do anymore, its horrible to see her in pain crying all day and not being able to do anything for her..

if yall have any ideas how we could get help,please please post it up,i dont wanna sound like im begging but if anyone would like to donate what you can afford it would be really really appreciated,this is a hard time for us but i leave it in gods hands!!

 

yeah same with my grandma.. spread one... but since she is old chemio is slowly killing her, fortunately we havent had a lack of money... i really dunno what you could do... im thinking of some kind of fundraiser... or selling food you can easily do at a park or something but im not that good at that kinda ideas

 

I am not sure if you believe in God or not but try praying?

I will keep your grandparents in my prayers as I pray for my own Grandma with cancer.
I pray for my grandma every day but I don't pray for miraculous miracles, but just that His will be done and that He (God) would take care of her and treat her well.

Peace

 

thoughts are with you guys.

 

god stay cool...you will be good alex

i have already been though this you know!!!!
it will all be ok

 

Update on this... my granmda passed away last thursday... im ok, i know shes wherever she belongs to... in arms of her beloved... And i know when my time comes, ill met them both all 3 of us the same age, and well drive away in an orange spyder...
Thnx for the comments guys... very much appreciated by me and my family

 

very sorry bro!!!