You know you own a dsm if....
#1
10-29-2006, 12:23 PM
You know you own a dsm if....
I deleted duplicates and took out some retarded ones, thats why the numbers are all wrong
1 = If you've ever had to explain crankwalk to a mechanic....
2 = If you have a garage full of spare engines, just in case....
3 = If you've tried to bolt your old 14b onto a riding lawnmower....
4 = If you've hit your head on the B-pillar during an AWD launch....
5 = If you have a running tab at the local tranny shop....
6 = If you go rallying in your daily driver....
7 = If your driveway has divets in it cause your car never moves....
10 = If people recognize your car by the sound of it's lifter tick....
11 = If you drive 5 extra blocks for a gas station that has 1 more octane point.
12 = If you get refused on your tread wear warranty every time you have tried, because of poor alignment.
13 = If you bought half of your performance parts at Home Depot.
14 = If every time you beat up a V8, they tell you that something was wrong with their car.
15 = If you find yourself hanging with bikes out of the hole.
16 = If people ask you what's wrong with your car because it keeps making this noise.
17 = If your freinds get beat in a race and call you immediately after to rematch for them.
18 = You have had to send a tow truck back to the towing garage because you needed a flat-bed.
19 = You always request parts for an Eclipse because the parts stores always lookup the AMC Eagle.
20 = You drop whatever you are doing when the UPS man brings a new part for the car. And then spend the rest of the day installing it.
21 = You only carry a Palm Pilot to log your engine's data.
22 = You change your tires, plugs and fuel curves for the winter.
23 = You know more about the 4G63 engine than some engineers at Mitsubishi.
26 = if you think your dsm should have come with a flatbed/tow truck following you from the factory
28 = If you lose a race and the other guy says "Damn that cars fast!"
29 = your car spends more time being broken than being driven
30 = you dont let people drive your car into the bays because its "quirky"
31 = you spent more fixing it than it cost
32 = your eye automatically catches EVERY dsm that drives by on the highway
33 = your out driving/fixing in the winter more then you EVER wanted to be.
34 = if it's a 2g non spyder, you quickly check to see if it has stock dual pipes. then turn back to see you are swerving off the road
35 = before racing someone, you 90% of the time know their engine, hp, and performance specs. and you usually know if you will win or not
36 = right before u start modding, some damn matainence thing breaks down (i.e. alternator, starter)
37 = u barely have money for fun time (teenagers)
39 = you look at riced out civics and roll your eyes
40 = right after you get your paycheck, you get online and spend it all on parts the same day.
41 = Every tire shop/parking garage/car wash/repair shop guy stalls out when he lets out your ACT 2600 clutch.
42 = Your exhaust note is so deep and unique that people expect you to pass by 1/4 mile before you get there.
43 = You wonder where all your money goes.
44 = when you go to fix something minor you ALWAYS expect a major hassle and something else is GOING to go wrong.
46 = If your on a diet because you ran out of weight reductions for your car...
47 = If a junk yard to you is an upgrade yard.....
48 = If your car consists of parts from more than 10 other DSMs.....
49 = If you always have to show your car in a garage.....
51 = If you have a stick in your car, that's job is to prop up the hatch.....
52 = If your pasanger window takes more that five minutes to get all the way up.
53 = If you never put more than a quarter tank of gas in your car.....
54 = If your DSM is the most unreliable car you have ever owned, but still your favorite......
56 = The UPS guy comes over for a beer on a regular basis
58 = Paypal.com sends you christmas cards
59 = An average oil change involves fresh oil, new filter and draining the catch can.
60 = The pages of your shop manual have more wear than the tires on your car.
61 = You know the meaning of VFAQ.
62 = Some people would like to go to Europe, you'd like to visit Normal IL.
63 = You get in alot of races because your car "auto-revs" for you.
66 = You can launch your oil dip stick 20ft.
67 = You know that your car has a built in toolbox under the hood....
68 = If a honda owner ever looked at you funny when you say "free mods"
69 = You have a bucket full of nuts and bolts and your car seems to run fine and you can't figure out where the heck they go.
71 = you carry a hydraulic jack with in your car at all times
72 = when being towed you have to lift the front end of the car with your hands so the intercooler clears.
74 = When the flatbed finally comes, you ask the tow guy for a piece of wood to put under your right rear tire (or left, if it's a 2G) so you don't scratch your muffler
76 = If everytime you launch, you can't see the damn road all the way through 1st gear (AWD)
77 = Your headliner that's falling off combs your hair every morning (1G)
78 = You hear a different vibration inside your car for different RPM points (1G)
79 = You are afraid to grab your Crank Pulley and check for play (2G 7-bolt)
82 = when people say "is your car running again?" you say "kinda"
83 = every time you work on your car you end up with more bolts than you started with
84 = you have a laptop with a datalogger and manual CD on it in your car at all times
86 = people that can "drive stick" stall your car out 5 times before they get it out of the driveway
87 = people think you are just revving your car in neutral when in fact it is 1st gear (fwd dsmers)
88 = you have gotten in many arguements on how "your car CAN't be THAT fast". it is a friggin 4 cylinder mitsubishi!!!
89 = you have to explain to a mechanic of 35+ years what "boost creep" is.
90 = if you slam 2nd hard enough your wipers turn on
91 = you buy a k&n filter and call it an "intake"
92 = you thought you blew up your dsm but in fact the dipstick popped out and sprayed oul all over the manifold causing massive smoke
93 = when someone asks you how the car is running you never say "awesome" or "great", just "its running"
94 = you hate the "hump" (1G AWD)
95 = your friend with a 5.0 says "at least my car is reliable"
97 = you work all week so you can fix your dsm on weekends
98 = your friends think "phantom knock" is some sort of ghost movie
99 = If you drive your car for 10 minutes, park if for 2 hours, come back out...it only takes 2 minutes to have the heat full blastin again.
100 = You hear non-informed DSM'ers saying that chrysler over-all as a company sucks..and you have to reinform them that they are downing their own car.
101 = After racing the honda boys with their "pimped" out cars you have to pop your hood for them to belive your cars almost completely stock
103 = You are completely dumbfounded when people say that eclipses and talons are hot but lasers are slow?
104 = your mom claims a 4500 rpm launch "throws her back out"
105 = When over the school's intercom you hear "Excuse me but the white mitsubishi eclipse is still running."
106 = When you get asked at least once a week if 'That Hump' is supposed to be on your hood.
107 = Your friends with the tow company and they stop by every weekend to see what the new "project" is this weekend.
108 = You dance every morning when your car cranks over.
110 = your "grocery getter" is a 12 sec car...
111 = You have the shop mannuel memorized
112 = The local shop calls you to ask a question about a broken eclipse they have in there shop.
113 = when people driveur car...and ask-whats that noise...you always reply with-which one
114 = people driving ur car for the first time...get a new understanding fort
1 = If you've ever had to explain crankwalk to a mechanic....
2 = If you have a garage full of spare engines, just in case....
3 = If you've tried to bolt your old 14b onto a riding lawnmower....
4 = If you've hit your head on the B-pillar during an AWD launch....
5 = If you have a running tab at the local tranny shop....
6 = If you go rallying in your daily driver....
7 = If your driveway has divets in it cause your car never moves....
10 = If people recognize your car by the sound of it's lifter tick....
11 = If you drive 5 extra blocks for a gas station that has 1 more octane point.
12 = If you get refused on your tread wear warranty every time you have tried, because of poor alignment.
13 = If you bought half of your performance parts at Home Depot.
14 = If every time you beat up a V8, they tell you that something was wrong with their car.
15 = If you find yourself hanging with bikes out of the hole.
16 = If people ask you what's wrong with your car because it keeps making this noise.
17 = If your freinds get beat in a race and call you immediately after to rematch for them.
18 = You have had to send a tow truck back to the towing garage because you needed a flat-bed.
19 = You always request parts for an Eclipse because the parts stores always lookup the AMC Eagle.
20 = You drop whatever you are doing when the UPS man brings a new part for the car. And then spend the rest of the day installing it.
21 = You only carry a Palm Pilot to log your engine's data.
22 = You change your tires, plugs and fuel curves for the winter.
23 = You know more about the 4G63 engine than some engineers at Mitsubishi.
26 = if you think your dsm should have come with a flatbed/tow truck following you from the factory
28 = If you lose a race and the other guy says "Damn that cars fast!"
29 = your car spends more time being broken than being driven
30 = you dont let people drive your car into the bays because its "quirky"
31 = you spent more fixing it than it cost
32 = your eye automatically catches EVERY dsm that drives by on the highway
33 = your out driving/fixing in the winter more then you EVER wanted to be.
34 = if it's a 2g non spyder, you quickly check to see if it has stock dual pipes. then turn back to see you are swerving off the road
35 = before racing someone, you 90% of the time know their engine, hp, and performance specs. and you usually know if you will win or not
36 = right before u start modding, some damn matainence thing breaks down (i.e. alternator, starter)
37 = u barely have money for fun time (teenagers)
39 = you look at riced out civics and roll your eyes
40 = right after you get your paycheck, you get online and spend it all on parts the same day.
41 = Every tire shop/parking garage/car wash/repair shop guy stalls out when he lets out your ACT 2600 clutch.
42 = Your exhaust note is so deep and unique that people expect you to pass by 1/4 mile before you get there.
43 = You wonder where all your money goes.
44 = when you go to fix something minor you ALWAYS expect a major hassle and something else is GOING to go wrong.
46 = If your on a diet because you ran out of weight reductions for your car...
47 = If a junk yard to you is an upgrade yard.....
48 = If your car consists of parts from more than 10 other DSMs.....
49 = If you always have to show your car in a garage.....
51 = If you have a stick in your car, that's job is to prop up the hatch.....
52 = If your pasanger window takes more that five minutes to get all the way up.
53 = If you never put more than a quarter tank of gas in your car.....
54 = If your DSM is the most unreliable car you have ever owned, but still your favorite......
56 = The UPS guy comes over for a beer on a regular basis
58 = Paypal.com sends you christmas cards
59 = An average oil change involves fresh oil, new filter and draining the catch can.
60 = The pages of your shop manual have more wear than the tires on your car.
61 = You know the meaning of VFAQ.
62 = Some people would like to go to Europe, you'd like to visit Normal IL.
63 = You get in alot of races because your car "auto-revs" for you.
66 = You can launch your oil dip stick 20ft.
67 = You know that your car has a built in toolbox under the hood....
68 = If a honda owner ever looked at you funny when you say "free mods"
69 = You have a bucket full of nuts and bolts and your car seems to run fine and you can't figure out where the heck they go.
71 = you carry a hydraulic jack with in your car at all times
72 = when being towed you have to lift the front end of the car with your hands so the intercooler clears.
74 = When the flatbed finally comes, you ask the tow guy for a piece of wood to put under your right rear tire (or left, if it's a 2G) so you don't scratch your muffler
76 = If everytime you launch, you can't see the damn road all the way through 1st gear (AWD)
77 = Your headliner that's falling off combs your hair every morning (1G)
78 = You hear a different vibration inside your car for different RPM points (1G)
79 = You are afraid to grab your Crank Pulley and check for play (2G 7-bolt)
82 = when people say "is your car running again?" you say "kinda"
83 = every time you work on your car you end up with more bolts than you started with
84 = you have a laptop with a datalogger and manual CD on it in your car at all times
86 = people that can "drive stick" stall your car out 5 times before they get it out of the driveway
87 = people think you are just revving your car in neutral when in fact it is 1st gear (fwd dsmers)
88 = you have gotten in many arguements on how "your car CAN't be THAT fast". it is a friggin 4 cylinder mitsubishi!!!
89 = you have to explain to a mechanic of 35+ years what "boost creep" is.
90 = if you slam 2nd hard enough your wipers turn on
91 = you buy a k&n filter and call it an "intake"
92 = you thought you blew up your dsm but in fact the dipstick popped out and sprayed oul all over the manifold causing massive smoke
93 = when someone asks you how the car is running you never say "awesome" or "great", just "its running"
94 = you hate the "hump" (1G AWD)
95 = your friend with a 5.0 says "at least my car is reliable"
97 = you work all week so you can fix your dsm on weekends
98 = your friends think "phantom knock" is some sort of ghost movie
99 = If you drive your car for 10 minutes, park if for 2 hours, come back out...it only takes 2 minutes to have the heat full blastin again.
100 = You hear non-informed DSM'ers saying that chrysler over-all as a company sucks..and you have to reinform them that they are downing their own car.
101 = After racing the honda boys with their "pimped" out cars you have to pop your hood for them to belive your cars almost completely stock
103 = You are completely dumbfounded when people say that eclipses and talons are hot but lasers are slow?
104 = your mom claims a 4500 rpm launch "throws her back out"
105 = When over the school's intercom you hear "Excuse me but the white mitsubishi eclipse is still running."
106 = When you get asked at least once a week if 'That Hump' is supposed to be on your hood.
107 = Your friends with the tow company and they stop by every weekend to see what the new "project" is this weekend.
108 = You dance every morning when your car cranks over.
110 = your "grocery getter" is a 12 sec car...
111 = You have the shop mannuel memorized
112 = The local shop calls you to ask a question about a broken eclipse they have in there shop.
113 = when people driveur car...and ask-whats that noise...you always reply with-which one
114 = people driving ur car for the first time...get a new understanding fort
#4
10-29-2006, 08:42 PM
RE: You know you own a dsm if....
74 = When the flatbed finally comes, you ask the tow guy for a piece of wood to put under your right rear tire (or left, if it's a 2G) so you don't scratch your muffler
That one definately just happened last night. I love this list
That one definately just happened last night. I love this list
#6
10-29-2006, 11:51 PM
RE: You know you own a dsm if....
no way i read them all, but i randomly read some and there are alot that go with me.
341 = You decide to drive around just so people will look at you. (when i first bought my car)
31 = you spent more fixing it than it cost
43 = You wonder where all your money goes.
58 = Paypal.com sends you christmas cards (HAHA i get cards all the time from them)
69 = You have a bucket full of nuts and bolts and your car seems to run fine and you can't figure out where the heck they go. (haha i have my cup holder full)
130 = people tell you the bump on your hood is a turbo bump, even when it's a NT (OMG THAT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME) even though i dont know exactly what its for i always so no cuz my car is non turbo and came nt and wouldnt have it if it was for that.
170 = your wallet is full of autozone/autoparts reciets/lifetime warrantys in place of money (haha i have like 13 or 14 of em)
263 = You have 5 or more tools in your center console for everyday problems.( haha mainly dif sized wrenches)
269 = You purposefully wheelhop when your girlfriend is in the car to make her ***** dance. (haha, i usualy use the brake but...)
yea, thats when i randomly look at them, i didnt read them all... haha
341 = You decide to drive around just so people will look at you. (when i first bought my car)
31 = you spent more fixing it than it cost
43 = You wonder where all your money goes.
58 = Paypal.com sends you christmas cards (HAHA i get cards all the time from them)
69 = You have a bucket full of nuts and bolts and your car seems to run fine and you can't figure out where the heck they go. (haha i have my cup holder full)
130 = people tell you the bump on your hood is a turbo bump, even when it's a NT (OMG THAT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME) even though i dont know exactly what its for i always so no cuz my car is non turbo and came nt and wouldnt have it if it was for that.
170 = your wallet is full of autozone/autoparts reciets/lifetime warrantys in place of money (haha i have like 13 or 14 of em)
263 = You have 5 or more tools in your center console for everyday problems.( haha mainly dif sized wrenches)
269 = You purposefully wheelhop when your girlfriend is in the car to make her ***** dance. (haha, i usualy use the brake but...)
yea, thats when i randomly look at them, i didnt read them all... haha
#9
10-30-2006, 09:27 AM
RE: You know you own a dsm if....
ORIGINAL: 93eclipsegsx
the hump is there for some room for the cams and cover.
the hump is there for some room for the cams and cover.
#10
10-30-2006, 03:35 PM
RE: You know you own a dsm if....
ORIGINAL: TheEngineer
yea it was there in the 1g's so that the cam gears could fit. Then for the 2g's its actually not even necessary, but they kept it becuase it became sort of a trademark look
ORIGINAL: 93eclipsegsx
the hump is there for some room for the cams and cover.
the hump is there for some room for the cams and cover.